This Just In: A Housewife Loses Her Boo

I literally JUST got finish watchin Thursdays episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta that I missed, wishin I could do more than shift Kim's tardy ass wig and stomp her in her tardy ass face and back slap Kandi for giving Kim the ability to make it seem like she actually did something other than sound like she has to sing through a hole in her neck - when I read that AJ, Kandi's ex-boo is dead. Yes, dead. He was beaten to death in the parking lot of the strip join the Body Tap Club. It seems AJ worked at the club but nobody really knows what happened yet, however, there has been an arrest made. "Homicide detectives arrested the suspect, Fredrick Richardson, who has been charged with voluntary manslaughter, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution reports." Ain't this just about some shizz?!! Kandi was just about on my last nerve and now I can't even watch and be mad at her anymore cuz her boo is dead. Just dead. Beat to death in the parking lot of a strip club. All you can do is shake your damn head. Sad. Source

Close Your Legs To Married Men Trashy Hook-ah!

I finally got to see the interview that NeNe was supposed to be giving about her book but then Kim calls, and it becomes a back and forth between the two of them... Andy must LOVE his job. Is anybody else just ready for the reunion? AND since we talkin bout da Real Housewives....Bossip did an interview wth Kandi and I'm sorry, but something about Kandi's diagonal is just off. Something about her just seems a lil slow, a lil special...I mean one conversation with her seven year daughter kinda proved who has the brains in the family. Anyhoo...she is talkin about her relationship with her fiance and all his kids. She says when they first started dating she only knew about 3 of them. Then later she found out there were really 6 and basically due to circumstances, she was cool with it. UMMMMMMMMMMMMM....there is a HUGE difference between having 3 kids and 6 damn kids (by 4 baby mothas) and what possible circumstances could there have been that he didn't just come right out and say he had 6 kids? Maybe he was waitin for his episode of Maury to come on so he could find out that he is the father. AJ's Good Good must be Dicktastical!

Those Atlanta Housewives...

Seriously, what is in da sizzurp that the shemale Sheree is sippin on?! It don't even matter, whateva it is, keep sippin it boo...Sheree has become the reason I watch! When she explained her goal in grabbin Kim's wig: "I did not try to pull if off. I did not want to pull it off. I just wanted to shift it a little bit"....I was good for the rest of the night. If you notice, Kim's wig was definitely shifted. I can't with these bitches. Heeheeee...such a mess!

Atlanta Housewives By The By....

The shemale Sheree is now my favorite. Anybody ready to go toe to toe with a stankin ass queen who is all sorts of wrong and then calmly ask, "What happened to customer service?" is my kind. Definitely my kind.

NeNe Leakes Does Wendy Williams...

So have you guys been watchin The Wendy Williams Show? I'm sure you have cuz since it's debut on Monday, she's been #1 in her time slot and the number one rated show on BET (altho that's not hard to accomplish...fuck else is there to watch on BET?). You guys know that I love me some Wendy. She's most certainly a friend in my head. I listen to her on the radio most er'day. So of course, just like er'body else I was pumped and waitin for her show to come back. Now I watched her first show on Monday and I wasn't impressed....the way she was reading her notes for the hot topics and the randomness of it all plus I felt like Vanessa Williams was interviewing her....perfect for radio, but TV....I dunno. Anyhooo....I think she just had to get back into the swing of things. I just watched her interview with Atlanta Housewife Nene Leakes... All I have to say is, only a fabulous host like Wendy would be mixin liquor and servin her guest various Nuvo drinks. That's my kind of show, and that's the Wendy I know. LOVE HER!!!! By the way, can't WAIT for Real Housewives of Atlanta. I really hope Sheree pulls Kim's wig all the way off.

Introducing The REAL Real Houswives of NYC

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

The Count's New Boo

Mkay, so I'm sure you've all heard by now that Countess LuAnn on The Real Housewives of NYC is divorcing - well actually, the Count is divorcing her because he has a sideline h.....you know what, she's a grown woman and an African Princess so I'll say da count has a boo that he wants to make official. She is the granddaughter of King Abajifar, the last King from the Gibe Kingdom of Jimmaa and her name is Kemeria Abajobir. I know LuAnn is HEATED! Not only is he leaving her, but he's leaving her for an African woman! Feelings are hurt. I mean, maybe she shouldn't be so annoying. But even more importantly, she's a beauty AND Princess Kemeria doesn't have to pretend to be royalty and write books about that bullshit....she IS royalty and way more royal than the Count is. Shiiiiit, da Count done upgraded! I'm not mad neither. Source

A Real Housewife No Longer Has A House

So Sheree Whitfield of The Real Housewives of Atlanta is losing her home. Yes, her house has gone into foreclosure and there is documentation to prove it. It is real interesting how someone who claims to live so extravagantly and spends money so frivolously just to prove something to everyone else can't pay her mortgage. Now I know she has been waiting on a divorce settlement and I know that her husband was her bread and butter, but maybe instead of buying $3,000 bags for no reason, she could have thought more about her livelihood and her children and keeping a roof over her head. I dunno. Just a thought. Maybe next season she can live with NeNe. That I would actually pay money to see. Anyway, if you want to see the foreclosure documentations click: What's a budget? Good luck with that Sheree.

Team Bethenny!!!

So I finally got around to catching last week's episode of The Real Housewives of New York City. Now, I have to say that the NYC bitches are my least favorite of all the Housewives bitches....they are the fugliest, the most annoying, and the most pointless. Of all the fabulousity in NYC it just baffles me that these are the ones representin...then again, those that are fabulous prolly don't have time to be on nobody's reality show. Anyhooo, I still watch and if I had to choose a favorite it is definitely Bethenny. She is the only one one who doesn't take herself so seriously and she is actually smart, witty, and I appreciate her sarcasm. On the flip side, while the other housewives get on my nerves(Ramona especially), this season Kelly is the new housewife, and I have to say, she is the most ignorant, superficial, mentally challenged, unaware, ridiculous, dumb bitch of all the housewives of all time. Seriously. I feel sorry for her children. And it was obvious that her own children don't like her from the episode that she made the daughters put on pink sweaters when it was summer, it was hot, and they were inside having a cooking lesson by Sam (the first ever Top Chef winner) that they didn't want to have. Mkay. So this past episode was a follow-up from the previous episode in which there was a meeting of the housewives for a charity event being put on in honor of Jill's daughter who has arthritis. Kelly shows up to the meeting beyond late and only planned to stay a few minutes. When learning that Jill's daughter has arthritis Kelly says, "that's cute." When learning that their names would be on the event she proceeds to rant about how her name doesn't go anything because she doesn't even have time for her own charities. So one of the women in the meeting (not a housewife) siting next to Bethenny asks "who is she?" and Bethenny says, "I don't know. Madonna?" (Heehee) So in this episode, Kelly invites Bethenny to have a drink with her because she is still upset that Bethenny had to call her names and "be rude" and blah blah. Bethenny actually shows up and of course is on time. Kelly shows up a half hour late, and when Bethenny says I've been waiting for you for a half hour, Kelly says, "Oh really that's too bad." And well, please watch the rest of this 'conversation' for yourself. YOU MUST. All I have to say is, Bethenny handled this confrontation amazingly. She kept her cool, remained poised, always had the perfect response, and allowed Kelly to continue to show the world that she lacks class and brain cells.

It Might Have Been Just Me But I Could Have Sworn.....

That gay is as gay does. No? Mkay. I think I'm really late on this but um....first let me just say that I am NOT shocked and RuPauled that my favorite Atlanta Housewife Dwight Eubanks is rockin fur pants cuz I mean, he's a mess of all proportions, he makes me giggle, and I expect such ridiculousness from Ms. D. What I don't understand, what has me more than confused, and what I no longer find funny is the fact that it seems that Ms. D wants to be a REAL housewife so bad, he done found him a woMan to marry him. Yes, Ms. D is engaged to be married. Please excuse my open mouth and Audrina Eyes. I can't. I really can't! Oh da hell, who am I kidding! You know Ms. D is getting his own reality show and I can't wait! The thought of him pretending to be in love with a woman while applying his face and curling his wigs is all too much for me to even try to contain my excitement. This is the shizz I love! Source

Bravo Throws Lockjaw Da Dueces

So Lockjaw aka Deshawn Snow (the one nobody gives a fuck about...but she's nice tho) has NOT been asked to return to Real Housewives of Atlanta. She was a waste of space so um, good. Oh and word is that Sheree (the one who has a fashion line and has been waiting to live off of her settlement) has withdrawn her extra divorce settlement suit and is prolly only gonna get one million and a kick in her ass. She's prolly gonna be off the show too...I mean, what will she have to talk to about now that her divorce will be final and she ain't got shit? Anyhoo, Deshawn spoke to Essence about gettin kicked off the show.... ESSENCE.COM: We hear that you are no longer returning to "The Real Housewives of Atlanta." Is that true? DESHAWN SHOW: Yes, one of the producers called me yesterday and said that they wouldn't take my option. ESSENCE.COM: What reason did they give for not inviting you back for the second season? SNOW: [One of the producers] called and said that I was "too human for a circus show" and that because the show did so well, they are about to pump up the drama and they didn't think that I would fit in. He gave me an example, saying that during the reunion when I found out what a few of the other ladies said about me, they were expecting me to say more, but I'm not the type to go "television" and start acting crazy because somebody's talking about me. I'm fine with the decision. It wasn't my decision. They let me go and there are no hard feelings. I am thankful for the opportunity. ESSENCE.COM: So were you at all shocked by the decision? SNOW: I didn't see it coming. I was shocked because I just talked to them in December about the new season. It's not like they came to me and gave me an option by saying, "We're going to take a new direction and we want to know if you could be more like this." I was a little hurt, but I just look at it like I am what I am. [My personality] didn't seem to be a problem before, but I suppose the show took a different direction and they no longer see me as the right fit. If you look at all the other housewives, they are all different. I believe God moves people out of your way. It's about God having his hand upon you and doing things for you. I'm not judging my situation. I look at the show as just a shutter-glimpse of what God has in store for me. I enjoyed being on the show and hanging with the girls. At the end of the day, I was the same person throughout the show. I never changed. I was authentic and true to myself and I can't control what other people do. ESSENCE.COM: There are rumors that Tameka Foster might replace you. Is that true? SNOW: Yes, I heard that, but I don't know. I wouldn't say that they are replacing me because they didn't think I was real enough or too real enough for the show, so I doubt they are going to bring in someone who has a similar personality as mine. Mkay seriously....Jelly Belly (Ursher's wife) to be a Housewife? Seriously? HA! I'll believe that when I see it and even if I see it I won't believe it. Do we really think Usher is gonna play any part in this mess? His album ain't do that bad....did it?

Derek Blanks Does It Again

Derek Blanks is just off da chain! How is it that he manages to make everybody and anybody look gorgeous?! He's proved himself to be one of the best in the photog game and he's done it again with this photo shoot of NeNe. She looks fab! Her styling and make-up are perfect for her (her clothes fit!) and how some lighting, special flash and an extra special camera can work miracles! I love it! Source

Bad Girls Club

So the best part of the Atlanta Housewives Reunion was Dwight, his wet and wavy weave, him telling Kim that they have to 'work on bringing her into the 21st century' cuz her wig is a hot dead rodent mess, Kim crying and lying about having Cancer, and of course, NeNe. I waited for Lisa to smack the shit out of Kim but it looks like if that really did happen, we'll never see it...BUT I do want to point out how odd it seemed that Lisa was able to just tell Kim how she will flip her over the couch and she's not the one and Kim didn't say anything in response and it just went to the next topic. Something tells me some shit got edited. Anyway, I'm going to miss my weekly dose of NeNe, BUT I have yet something even more out of control and totally unnecessary to look forward to AND I will actually get to SEE bitches catch beat downs!! See for yourself! Yay!!!!

Dallas Austin Really Meant To Say...

So I'm sure you all watched the season finale of "The Real Houswives of Atlanta"...seriously, the whole time I was like why isn't this the Reunion and if I see one more commercial for the Real Housewives of OC....In any case, on the finale, nothing really serious happened. The best part for me was when Dallas called Kim to basically tell her that she had to get serious and stop smoking etc. And I was just waiting for him to be honest with her and say Kim, listen you tranny whore who may spend thousands of dollars on designer clothes but still manage to look like Wal-Mart trash with your busted Bratz doll wig and your clown make-up puttin lipstick around your lips to make them look bigger homewreckin heffa - YOU CAN'T SING! And not only can't you sing, but you sound like a cat - oh my bad, how does your second grade educated ass spell cat? Right, KAT - trapped in a garbage disposal after a moose tried to eat it. But he didn't say that. However, this is what he put on his MySpace page: "... THE "REAL" Housewife, Kim Zolciak, is NOT WORKING WITH ME -- WE ARE NOT DOING A SONG... WE ARE NOT DOING AN ALBUM!! *** JUST WANNA PUT THIS OUT THERE!!!" *** Had he just told her the truth on the show from day one, all this extra shit could have been prevented. And the dumb bitch is really telling people that her album or her single is coming out the first week in January. If this bitch actually gets to record an album, ya'll best gets yourselves ready....cuz F.U. will be hittin a studio and ya'll need to check for the album end '09. Ya heard? And I just wanna say a lil sumtin bout Sheree...so she calls Mychael Knight from Project Runway to see if he can help her with her disaster of a fashion "viewing" of her "line" and it was more than obvious that she has not a clue what she is doing and she is indeed just like any other athlete's wife who thinks cuz she has money she can just decide to do anything she feels like it. Fashion design is not something that just any old bitch who likes nice clothes can do. Well, I take that back....but still. You have to breathe, live and eat that shit. Like Mychael does. And for you to be more concerned with having a grand party to show off nothing than to get your clothes fixed shows where your head is at. You have to study that shit. You can't even sketch your own shit! You had to hire somebody to every last thing for you! Your husband's money and your name is the only thing you seem to be able to contribute - and even the name is something you may want to reconsider. Maybe do some research. Study the industry. What happens if you don't get that 7 figure settlement you're waitin on? Your money won't be able to save you if you don't have any talent or the ability to create and facilitate sans talent. Anyhoo... I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE REUNION!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And Bravo is keepin us salvatin by givin us a sneak peak. Watch NeNe and Lisa go at dat Hillbilly Ho Kim. Source

Kim Needs Her Ass Beat!

Sooooo, I'm sure you've all heard by now that on the Real Housewives of Atlanta Reunion show, Lisa had to slap a ho. And that ho would be that fugly ass tone deaf plastic bitch Kim. Now, when I first heard about this, I was like DAYUM, if anybody got to slappin bitches, I would have thought it would have been NeNe. But if Lisa is bringin da five fingers then that means Kim cuh-learly done crossed the damn line. And I for one am so glad that somebody felt it was time to show this bitch what time it is. So now Lisa is scared for her life and done hired a lawyer and wants a restraining order agains Lisa. She even is claiming that Lisa is leaving her threatening messages. Well Lisa tells Essence just what da hell is goin on: ESSENCE.COM: Your costar Kim Zolciak has accused you of threatening to kill her. Is that true? LISA WU HARTWELL: Never would I threaten to kill anyone. Kim made a very heinous statement about me. She said I was a crack whore [Zolciak denies making this statement.] and that's the reason I don't have my kids [Justin and Jason]. Not only did she lie and insult me, but she insulted my children and my integrity. I have never done drugs in my life. I am a businesswoman. ESSENCE.COM: Wow. Who did Kim tell that you were a "crack whore"? HARTWELL: She was on the set of Demi Moore's new film "The Joneses," which costars David Duchovny and Chris Williams [the brother of "Ugly Betty" star Vanessa Williams], and the "Real Housewives of Atlanta" cast was invited to star in as extras. I declined, but she and Sheree went. She didn't realize the people she said this to about me were friends of mine. I'm a businesswoman-an actress, writer and producer of movies-and to have her making up lies about me to people I could potentially work with one day is crazy! She said those things in front of Demi Moore. ESSENCE.COM: Did you leave her threatening messages on her voicemail or text her messages to her cell phone? HARTWELL: Yes, I did call her and told her she needed to call me because I wanted to address the lies she'd been spreading about me. I was never threatening, but I did tell her that I would show up at her house if I didn't hear from her to talk woman to woman. I believe she's trying to extend her 15 minutes of fame, but why at my expense? I have a life outside of this show. It's unfortunate that Kim has made me her target. Perhaps it's because throughout the whole show you don't see me engaging in any drama like this. What she said was very hurtful. She insulted me as a mother and a wife. She was once a wife and is a mother, so I don't understand why she would do this. ESSENCE.COM: Allegedly she's put out a restraining order against you. Is that true? HARTWELL: I had heard that, but how could she? I've never threatened her or laid a hand on her. In fact, last week we did a talk show together and I didn't say one word to her. Honestly, I really don't think Kim is dealing with a full deck. She lies constantly. Of course when I asked her about what she said about me not having custody of my kids she denied that she ever said I was a crack whore. [Zolciak denies filing a restraining order.] ESSENCE.COM: When we last spoke you said that you were a "sparring woman." Does that mean you'd be willing to get physical? HARTWELL: Would I engage in any physical activity with Kim? Absolutely not. She's not worth my time. Do I know how to defend myself if I were attacked? Yes. When I said I was a "sparring woman" I simply meant I'll spar with anyone in the ring. Martial arts teaches you self-control especially when it comes to your emotions. You can't just react to everything. I would only use it in self-defense. The weird thing is when I spoke to Kim she said, "Lisa, this is water under the bridge." And then now I find out she's claiming that she fears for her life. I wonder if all of this was staged. She knows how I feel about my kids and if anyone were to insult them it would strike a nerve. Again, I didn't threaten this woman and I only made one call to her and absolutely no text messages. If I did, don't you think they would have shown it on TMZ.com? Well there you have it people. Kim is dumb lyin ass bitch who needs attention. You know if she would call NeNe a low budget bitch that she would absolutely call Lisa a crack whore. And I still haven't learned that gettin physical is a waste of time, so I'll beat her ass for you Lisa. Lemme at her! Oh and one more thing, if you've heard rumors about Kim and Big Poppa splittin up, this is what this home-wreckin skank said about it: "The Real Housewives of Atlanta" star Kim Zolciak spoke with ESSENCE.com this week to confirm that she and secret boyfriend otherwise known as Big Poppa were going through some problems. While Kim admits that her mystery guy is in the midst of a divorce, she also says that she and Big Poppa are currently taking time off from one another."We're on an off right now. The show has definitely taken a toll on our relationship too so we will see what happens. We're still engaged but the footage, the gossip, the show, the rumors are all the reasons why I didn't have him on the show. It was completely my decision and it had nothing to do with him being married." Ugh! Lemme at her!!! Source