Why Kelly? Just WHY????

Did Yonce make you wear this? Did she tell you that wearing fuchsia velvet was hot and that it would make people want to go to your concert? Did she also cut the legs so that they weren't quite capris but not quite high waters either? Oh lord Kelly Ro...I love you but you make my head hurt. You make feel like I have heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach and diarrhea. I'm too weak to continue....I'm fading Kelly Ro....you just make it so hard....please....stop....next she'll make you wear her turban....I can't...it hurts....