Friday, January 22, 2010

What Would You Do If Your Lover Leaves You For His Wife?

Make big ass billboards and post them on buildings in three major cities of course!! 41 year old YaVaughnie Wilkins got pissed when her married boyfriend decided to end their affair and return to his wife. The married man happens to be businessman Charles E. Phillips, who also happens to be an advisor to President Barack Obama. How bout that.

She spent $50K of her own money to create these billboards and post them in NYC, Atlanta and in San Francisco where Mr. Phillips lives. She also included a quote said to her by Mr. Phillips: “You are my soulmate forever!”

Note to jumpoffs, mistresses, hos and heffas: they will always tell you what they want you to hear as long as you keep fuckin them. I mean, duh.

Note to YaVaughnie Wilkins, you could have spent your $50K on maybe rezsughin your weave piece and find you a man who isn't married. Just a thought. But you do get an A for thinkin big tho....made me giggle.

Did You Ever Think You Could Sit On Someone...

And kill them? A 300 pound woman sits on her 120 pound boyfriend and kills him. Death by sitting...I had no idea.


Monday, January 18, 2010

Congrats Mo'Nique!!!

Mo’Nique wins a Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actress for her role in Precious. Nothing much left to say except, well deserved.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Why Everyone Loves A School Play....

No school I've ever gone to would have even attempted to put on "Peter Pan". Figuring out how to make people fly and keep the set in tact would have just been way too much. This is why we stuck to just doing "Fame," over and over again.

And I always love the crying babies and the people who talk throughout the entire play. That is how you know you are officially at a school play. Fun times.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Really Like This Guy...

Everything is amazing...and nobody's happy. Speak on it, dude. Speak.

Friday, January 8, 2010

Just For Giggles....

Shiz like this won't let me quit....


Thursday, January 7, 2010

Flavor Flav Might Be The Reason I Really Quit This Bitch

You know, everyday I hope to find something worth bloggin about. I get messages from some of you asking just where da fuck am I and why I'm not posting as much as I used to. There are many answers to that question but the real and most important reason is....this world makes me need a cocktail of Pepto, Alka, and a splash of brown juice. I know I say I can't, regularly, but seriously people...I can't.

I thought watching Mariah be a drunken 15 year old was enough for me. She accepted two awards more than a lil tipsy and/or after poppin special PEZ - one for her role in Precious (which she doesn't deserve...anybody could have wore a lil mustache, frumpy clothes, had a make-up less face, and sat there and looked at Precious' files) and last night she won the People's Choice award for favorite R&B singer (Ummmmm, how in da fuck did she beat Beyonce? Her last song was a tribute to Eminem being mad at her.)....

I even thought having to hear about how Tila fuckin Tequila, whose name I shouldn't even know, is spending her days getting press off of the death of her "fiancee" Casey Johnson on Twitter was enough for me.

But no, I come across this new video by Flavor Flav singing a R&B song and my Audrina eyes and slack jaw just became too much for me. Really Flav? REALLY?

I don't understand. When did delusional become the thing to be? I want to laugh - mkay, I did giggle at first but then I just couldn't. My brain is suffering from the pointless and no longer entertaining crap that is shared over and over again all day.

And then of course, just when I say I'm done, I catch an episode of Bad Girls and watch in amazement how Natalie shows how fugtasticals just need to be confident and they too can run L.A. and be friends with no names like the little brother on Moesha and have sex with a Boston Celtic who can't even close his mouth cuz his teef are too big.

I also watch Jersey Shore and have to stop myself from fist pumping, letting my rolls hang over my short shorts, and hittin up the tanning salon - SIKE. I just watch to see if Snooki will get decked again.

And because of this, I know that I'm in a vicious cycle of being addicted to the very thing that I hate - senseless bullshit. So I guess I can't ever really quit but you guys can thank Flavor Flav for my continued hibernation.

Miss u, luv u, mean it.

Monday, January 4, 2010

Is Teddy Riley Really Explainin' Da Beat Down On TMZ?

Yes. Have mentioned that I can't? SMDH.

How funny is it that the TMZ guy doesn't even care about Teddy's pointless explanation and would have much rather been watching why that car screeched to a halt. Damn Teddy...

2010 Begins...& Tiger Woods Gets Gully

Is this shirtless, mean muggin, iron pumpin Tiger Woods supposed to explain why he couldn't keep his wee wee out of fugly cocktail waitress' coochie? The year starts and I can't. Sell your mags Vanity Fair.