Holy Fuckin Fug!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OMFG! This can't be real. I got the most fabulous message from Thug Granny today (it's my pleasure to keep you in stitches...luh u boo!) with the most horrendous picture of this..... NO, NO, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I CAN'T! This just can't be real. This has to be beyond photo shopped because I will be damned if there really is a bitch walkin around with four baby teeefus and a mouth full of gums. Even if we didn't disucss that beyond enormous nose, would you look at those damn eyebrows? You could make a wig out of those shits. And then the WONK eye and that fuckin hair. Her hair is growin out of her forehead. Yeah, this is totally fake. There can't be anyone really walkin round lookin like this and then smilin for the camera like its ok. But seriously, if this is real, where ever you are Gummy Bear....if you don't get your fuckin ass to a dentist, an optometrist, Dr. 90210 and a hair salon I might have to hunt you down and take you out of your own fuckin misery. Thug Granny, keep em' comin!

And I Luh U Back!

Seems I've been missed....and well, I love it. I have been out of pocket for a few days due to other obligations and me just not feeling like it. I mean there was one day where I was feeling like Lara Flynn Boyle's holy fuggin jacked up face. There was even a minute where I almost bust my ass like Paris did, except for the fact that I didn't. Nor did my boyfriend trip over my head in order to save himself from busting his own ass. But then I got better and I knew it was all good because I had a dream that I lived in a house that was just like Mary J. Blige's new house that she bought for like $12 million that was listed at $17 million not so long ago. This house is 4.2 acres, has eight-bedrooms, a 14-seat movie theater, a fitness center, a hardwood basketball court and an elevator. It also has a gourmet kitchen, eight bathrooms, a spiral staircase and a wine tasting room. Yup, I'll prolly be moving into my joint in about 2,4,8,12....yup, around then. And basically, I'm almost back to normal and ready to tell somebody she's a fugly heffa. And I tell you, gigglin at this clip from Sacha Baron Cohen's Bruno mockumentary only helped to motivate me. Bruno is so hilariously gay. Please look at the outfits, the boots and the finger and booty shake. I will be trying this at home. So I'm back bitches....I'm ready to get back to my regularly scheduled programs...but not til tomorrow, mkay? Smooches! Love, My middle finger

Holy Fug Part2!!

Mkay so do you guys remember when Renee Fugweger hit up the Bee Movie premier scaring the kids away cuz she was so damn fug?! Well dammit this bitch came to another premier for her movie Leatherheads looking like a Leather Face! Ewwwwwww! And no, this is not a bad angle. This is how this bitch looks in real life when she isn't being photo shopped for some magazine cover. She looks so greasy and beat. And what is up with her lipstick? And could she have at least tried to comb her hair?! UGH! Source

The Oscars

So um, yeah, I didn't really watch. Lifetime was showing "Misery" and I forgot how crazy that bitch was in that movie. Memba how she breaks his legs?! Love that movie! Anyway, I did catch a few red carpet moments and I did try to watch the beginning but Jon Stewart was actually not funny, the awards given out in the first hour or so were a bunch of "who gives a shits", and that song from that movie Enchanted was when I was really like aw hell to da naw. I mean could she have at least wore her Cinderella dress to jazz it up a lil bit? Maybe a mouse or two to come out and sing with her? I had to change the channel but then turned back right quick to catch a choir and a little black girl SANGIN....but that was enough for me. I realized that I hadn't seen not a one movie that was nominated for anything important so how could I possibly care...and I knew Ruby Dee was not going to win. And that's when "Misery" got good! I did want to show the following ensemble that was the best entertainment of the whole evening. Daniel Day-Lewis' wife showed up wearing, I think, what has to be the most fugliest ensemble I've ever seen. From the red ribbons to the velvet top with whatever that shit is on the front (big ass flower buttons?) to the ill-fitting bottom to those fuckin shoes. Thank you lady. Your fugtastic dress made it all worth it.

HOLY FUG!

I am literally at a loss for words.....how does one describe this all out mess of vomitious fugly self-hatred, mutilation, horrendous wig and weavage and ass of goldendoodle bangs? I can't....I thought Fugney Chudney gave me acid indigestion....just shee-it.

Holy Fug!!!

When in the da HELL did Fugnee Zellweger turn into such a monster? DAYUM! This bitch got the nerve to show up at the premier of The Bee movie looking like that...I can imagine how many kids ran away and cried after seeing her scary Gremlin looking ass.

Seriously, WTF????!!!!

Kim is BEYOND Fug. And it isn't like she was born Fug like Chudney. No, this bitch MADE herself fugala. I mean, it was bad enuff you wanted Michael's nose but you have to put on the white powder too?! Damn you Kim!