Thursday, April 30, 2009

Toe Jam!

Oh Tasia. Wow. Ummmmm Tasia, honey....have you scheduled your bunionectomy yet? I really hope that is on your to do list. Maybe you want to invest in shoes that fit? Maybe look into gettin those dogs sandblasted? And let me guess...your crypt keeper toes aren't pedicured cuz there prolly isn't enough money in the world you can pay somebody to touch those shits...Am I right? Seriously Tasia, hammer time is an understatement. Just work on that. Mkay? Luh u, bye.

Kimora Lee Has A Baby Shower!

How excited are you to see the offspring of Kimora Lee and Djimon Hounsou? I cannot wait! Ya'll know how much I LOVE me some Ming and Aoki who are beautiful and have a father who, well, isn't the cutest kid in the class. So can you imagine what KiKi and the Chocolate Andonis' baby gonna look like? Gorgeous! Then again, I have learned that two hots don't always = hot. Sometimes two hots = fug. Sometimes two hots = hot. Many times, two fugs = hot. But the norm is a hot + fug = hot or fug. Look at your parents and do the math.

Anyway, Kimora Lee and Djimon are both very excited about their new baby.

"...with a “last minute, low key” baby shower April 19th, less than two months before she’s due to deliver her third child. “I’m about to have a baby,” the 33-year-old guest of honor exclaimed. Clad in blue, Kimora said that although she’s not 100% certain about the baby’s sex, she and partner Djimon Hounsou are “leaning heavily towards the blue team!” Already mom to Ming Lee, 9, and Aoki Lee, 6 ½, Kimora says her bump is decidedly different this time around.

“With the girls I was wider in the belly. Now I’m narrower, but if I turn sideways I can’t fit through the door!”

Guests — including Holly Robinson Peete and Stevie Wonder – dined on delicacies like shrimp caviar and poached salmon, along with comfort foods like macaroni and cheese and a fondue fountain with chocolate, fruit and marshmallows, all from the Beverly Hills Hotel. Kimora’s influence was evident throughout the menu. “I was very involved with the food because I’m a greedy pregnant girl,” she explains. “I’ve been eating a lot of spicy food. I put jalapeños in everything!”

Also on hand was dad-to-be, who is anxiously anticipating the arrival of his first child. “Djimon is a spiritual person, and it’s a big deal for him to have a baby,” Kimora says. “When he first saw the heartbeat at the ultrasound, he said he felt very humbled.” Ming and Aoki — who “don’t quite get the birds and the bees,” and instead think that they are responsible for what’s growing in mommy’s belly — are looking forward to becoming big sisters, as well.

“The girls love being princesses. They love fashion and being girly. The girls say, ‘We’re going to dress the baby up!’ Djimon’s like, ‘No, you’re not going to be pinning tulle to the boy!’”


Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Gotti's Way

I am actually quite pumped about season 2 of Gotti's Way. I feel like this is one of few reality shows that is actually real and Gotti just makes shit entertaining. I also like how Irv and Deb show the depth of their relationship and how easy it for women to get caught up in years of bullshit. And I have to say, I get it. I see why it is so hard for Deb to leave him. However, it's time and let's hope she figures out how to break the cycle.

Do You Want To Work For Diddy?

It's Season 2 and the search has begun! I don't even memba who won last season. I can only remember Poprah and the tranny who added "shocked and ru pauled" to my daily vocabulary. Anyway, they are now doing LIVE online casting and maybe YOU can be on the show and I'll memba you when season 3 rolls around.

If you think you have what it takes to be on call 24/7, make sure Day 26 has toilet paper, Diddy's kids have life size ice sculptures at their parties, and drink Ciroc all day then click: Bitchassness Welcome.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

I Mean, I Can Say I'm A Millionaire Too..

How the hell is Farrah Franklin on Millionaire Matchmaker and NOT as a bitch who is tryna win a date but as a millionaire lookin for a date????? I had the serious screw face on and was like mkay before I run off at the mouth, let me do some research. And according to Wikipedia (and just plain ol' common sense) Farrah ain't do enough in her career for to be a millionaire. Like not even enough to front like she's one...but it seems that is indeed what's she doin. I was thinking that maybe she wrote some shit that she is still gettin royalties, no. And you know she was only in Destiny's Child for 5.6 seconds and Yonce wasn't gonna let her contribute shit...I'm sure she done spent whatever lil DC checks she got. The only other thing she's done is some acting (in independent films that you know don't pay shit) and some modeling. Maybe she's a trust fund baby?

And even more importantly, why da hell is she on this show. I mean, Farrah can't get a date? Seriously? And is going on Millionaire Matchmaker supposed to help her career? I'm just all confused...but I'll be watching.

Watch this clip of Patti goin off on Farrah for showin up four hours late to the meet 'n' greet. Don't make no damn sense.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Watchu Talkin Bout Lotion?

Seriously Arnold, I know times are hard and they been hard for you for more than a minute, but you can't tell me lotion ain't in the budget. I mean, DAAYUM! Skin looks like it will actually cut a bitch. And I won't even get to talkin bout those dirty ass Crocs....


Sunday, April 26, 2009

Bye Bea....

I'm sure you've all heard by now...Bea Arthur, one of the most hilarious and talented actresses to ever do it, has joined her "Ma", Estelle Getty, in the Golden Palace in the sky. I was so sad to hear that Dorothy died. That's my Bitch right there! Love me some Dorothy. No one could roll up a newspaper and knock Rose upside her head like Dorothy. Bea had a career that spanned decades and won accolades for more than a few of her roles but she will always be Dorothy to me. She is truly a friend in my head.

Thank you for the years of laughter Bea! You will so be missed....

Enjoy the best of Dorothy!

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Jill Scott Is A Mommy!!

Congrats to Jill and her boo, fiancé Lil John Roberts as they have welcomed a baby boy into the world!!!! Jett Hamilton Roberts was born at 4:20 P.M. on April 20, weighing in at 7 lbs., 8 oz.

I am so happy for Jill! Jett is a truly a miracle baby since Jill thought she could never have children. He is also a good baby and I know this cuz she started filming her AMAZING new show "The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency" right after learning that she was preggers and he could have been one of those babies causing her drama in the womb and stopping her from working but no.....he just relaxed, even tho it was 3,000 degrees outside, and he let his mama do her thing.

Welcome to the world Jett!

P.S. Do you guys think Jett will partake in a particular activity seein as how he was born on 4/20 at 4:20? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

More On Twitter...

And this time it is coming from people who DON'T/WON'T Twitter. While one would think Beyonce would be Twitterin bout her movie comin out or how she and Jay just ate biscuits in NYC, she says she just doesn't get it.

"The singer, who is currently preparing for her forthcoming world tour, says she is not a fan of social networking sites. When asked whether she was on Facebook she replied: “Not really. I like to call people or have dinner”. “My sister is the Twitter queen. She told me about the twittering,” explained Beyonce. “But I don’t get it,” she continued. “I feel like I’m getting really old…I’m like, what? I don’t understand. Just call me. I don’t get it.”

Yonce I'm gettin old too cuz I just don't get it either. I've tried really hard too but my brain doesn't seem to want to comprehend the point. I'll be the first to admit that my brain cells lack power when it comes to certain things and Twitter is most certainly one of them. I just got over my annoyance of how people use Facebook....well actually, maybe I'm not over it but I can deal.

And me and Beyonce aren't alone. T.I. refuses to Twitter too.

That's a grown man right there. Love him.


Crack Pipe Burn?

Amy Wino was out and about in St. Lucia with her leg all burned up lookin a hot mess as per usual. All I know is that shit look like it HURTS! But that is how good the crack must be cuz she look like she don't even care that her thigh was on FIRE!

Her reps say she scalded herself while cooking. Ummmmm DUH! Cooking crack while high is dangerous folks. Take it from da wino.


Monday, April 20, 2009

JHud Let's Walter Steal Da Show!

So ya'll know Jennifer Hudson is on tour, right? Well she is and reviews are amazing...which isn't surprising, so if you can, make sure you check her out cuz you may just have a Walter in your audience. And who is Walter? Well Walter is fabulous and how you doin and was standing in front of the stage while Jennifer sang. Jennifer hands him the mic and let's him sing and well, you see for yourself....

Walter is a mess!!!!!! LOVE IT!!! You betta sang Walter!

And on a side note....ummmmmmm, is Jenny preggers or does she maybe need to be wearing more than one Spanx body suit? I'm actually thinkin there is a baby in that oven.....

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Obsessed.....With Idris Elba

I can stare at this man all day. Idris. Elba. I. Love. Me. Some. Him. I'm literally droolin....Mkay, lemme wipe my mouth and breathe.

Anyway, I got really excited cuz I thought that Rolling Out conducted a real interview with Idris about his new movie "Obsessed" AND maybe even asked him a lil bit about his VERY funny guest starring role on "The Office"....turns out they only had two questions and they were both about Beyonce. Da Fuck?! Really, like who does that? I mean not a one question about him.

Whatever, he is doin what he needs to do and he's my boo and I know he was just being nice cuz he wants people to see the movie and I'll translate his interview.

Elba's take on the film receiving a PG-13 rating …

"The process of making a movie with Beyoncé was unique, just because she's such a huge superstar. So when I first looked at the script, I thought the film could have and probably should have received an "R" rating on subject matter alone. But Beyoncé has such a responsibility to her younger fans that I believe it was necessary for them not to try certain things because of that responsibility."

What he really meant to say was: First of all, how the fuck did Beyonce even get this role? Yeah, she's a superstar or whatever but when I first looked at the script I just knew that a real actress with real acting skills was going to get this part. I just knew that me and Nia Long or Sanaa Lathan or Taraji P. Henson would be fantastic together. This film could have been amazing. Could have been worth seeing and not just because people would actually pay their money to watch Beyonce suck ass. AND even tho the excuse was that we had to tone down the script because Beyonce has young fans, we all knew it was because she doesn't have the talent to do alot of what was called for AND because her husband didn't want her naked. The film's writer allowed his work to be edited just so we could have a big name attached. Happens all the time in this industry.

On Beyoncé's growth on set …

"I think this was a very important role for her, because it was the first time she wasn't playing a singer. But when we first started taping, it was difficult for us to really connect as artists because she has such a huge machine behind her. So in the early going it felt divided … almost like it was her and her team on one side, and everyone else on the other. But once the cameras started rolling, she really opened up and those walls began to fall. As a result, I really saw her grow as an artist, and I think you'll be able to see it as well when you watch the film."

What he really meant to say was: Another fuckin question about Beyonce? Really??? She's a singer not an actor! We couldn't really connect as artists because SHE'S A SINGER NOT AN ACTOR!!! It was also hard for her to dig deep because her father is there staring at her and mother wants to make sure she always house on something called DooDooOn or Home of DooDooOn...something like that. She was recording her album at the same time so one day I was like look, why don't you just pretend you are the Sasha Fierce bitch you turn into when you sing when we're doing these scenes and let's try to get this done. I have real work to do when this shit is over. But I have to say, she did better than I thought she would. So I guess that's good, right? Anyway, come see for yourself.

And ya'll know that is what he really meant to say. And for real tho, in the commercials for that movie, Beyonce does not make you want to see the movie. Other than Idris, the white obsessed bitch is the one who looks like she might be real believable. When Beyonce says, "You think you're crazy. I'll show you crazy." I just shake my head. We don't believe you. YOU NEED MORE PEOPLE! Do you know how many real actors could deliver that line and make YOU scurred for the obsessed bitch?!

Anyway, I guess we shall see....won't we?

To check out Idris' full photo shoot click: Sorry, you're not invited to our wedding.

Reality TV....It Just Keeps Goin and Goin...

Er'body and their mama and 12 kids got a damn reality show. I'm a junkie, which is why they won't stop, but seriously will it ever end? Well with all the shows about to come out, the answer is simply hellz no.

VH1 is working on Fantasia's show which will debut in 2010. The show will follow Tasia being Tasia...a single mother, tryna keep her career, and her family (we all memba them from when she was on Idol...Get and Toe). Sounds like Keyshia Cole's show...except it may not be as many man down situations, prolly a lil less crack and her mama prolly has real teeth.

Rudy is gettin a show too! Yes, Keisha Knight Pulliam is getting a reality show on Oxygen. The show is about her and her boyfriend and living life as young rich bitches. "Oxygen said Wednesday that it’s developing a reality show about actress Keshia Knight Pulliam and her live-in boyfriend, Atlanta area entrepreneur Kaseem Penn. It will explore what it’s like being young, rich, single and co-habitating. No air date is set for the show, titled “Keshia and Kaseem.” The black Heidi and Spencer maybe? Well of course Keisha is famous for a reason but um, Kaseem is not (and I kinda wish he was cuter). I'm kind of surprised Rudy is OK with puttin her life on blast...even tho er'thing we'll see will be fake and edited. Should be interesting.

BET will be announcing it's new programming line up during upfronts and one of which is Monica's show, 'Monica: Standing Up' will follow her bid to break back into the music business, and Terry Crews' (the dad from Everybody Hates Chris) show, 'Crews Control', will follow Terry and his wife and five kids.

I will most certainly be watchin ALL of these shows. If reality is the only way to find relevance and/or to stay relevant then I guess we won't be seein the end of reality TV for years to come. Ugh.....


Wednesday, April 15, 2009

The Count's New Boo

Mkay, so I'm sure you've all heard by now that Countess LuAnn on The Real Housewives of NYC is divorcing - well actually, the Count is divorcing her because he has a sideline know what, she's a grown woman and an African Princess so I'll say da count has a boo that he wants to make official. She is the granddaughter of King Abajifar, the last King from the Gibe Kingdom of Jimmaa and her name is Kemeria Abajobir.

I know LuAnn is HEATED! Not only is he leaving her, but he's leaving her for an African woman! Feelings are hurt. I mean, maybe she shouldn't be so annoying. But even more importantly, she's a beauty AND Princess Kemeria doesn't have to pretend to be royalty and write books about that bullshit....she IS royalty and way more royal than the Count is. Shiiiiit, da Count done upgraded! I'm not mad neither.


Tuesday, April 14, 2009

The Dirty Dozen...

Playboy interviews celebrities about their sexual experiences and they call it The Dirty Dozen.

I don't know what it is about Lil Wayne, but I'm always so intrigued. I always seem to enjoy whatever he's talkin bout and this time is no different. He's so....what's the word...romatical.

How old were you when you lost your virginity and what were the circumstances?
I was 11 and the girl was 13. She had every board game you could imagine. I liked board games. We was playing Win Lose or Draw and on the board she wrote, "Fuck me." Now I was 11, and I didn't even know it meant "intercourse." I just knew it was a cuss word, so I was like, "Why is she cussing herself out?" She said, "Do you want to play 'Press Your Luck'? Well, the game is in my closet." She had a walk-in closet, so she said, "Go get it, it's right to the right…." When I walk to the closet she came in and cut the lights off and took off my pants, and I remember my ass was cold up against the wall. I was like, "What the hell!?" When I tried to push her off me, I felt that she was naked also, so I just stepped back and let her do what she do.

What celebrity would you most like to have sex with?
I'd probably love to have sex with…man, I think she's dead already. I'd probably want somebody like Marilyn Monroe -- somebody that's been with the president or something. If I had Marilyn Monroe, I would do whatever she asks and whatever she's never had done to her. And I swear I'd do it good!

How cautious are you when it comes to having sex?
I have to be more cautious now. Let me tell you the trick to that. What you do is stop ramming them hos and make love to that pussy! Make that pussy love you and that rubber ain't going nowhere. That rubber will be right there where you started off with if you make love to that pussy. That's when a nigga fuck up, when you trying to do too much. A nigga like me, I am gonna make the pussy so wet that there's no such thing as popping or slipping off. Only problem I am gonna have is keep slipping it in.

Ever had a threesome?
WAYNE: I think the most I've done before is five. I don't do groupies. I am not the groupie type. I am 25 years of age right now and the president and CEO of my own company. Dealing with a groupie was back when I was 15 years of age and when I dropped my first solo album. When I am doing five, it's usually two that's used to me and we've done this before. They know how to go out and get two or three more girls. They make the other girls' first time feel better—because that's a whole hump they gotta get over—because they ain't worried about you.

What's the most orgasms you've ever had in one 24-hour period?
WAYNE: Ooooh, shit! I've been "locked up" with this one chick and when I say "locked up," I mean locked in a room and she made you go, man! So I probably done it like 10 or six times in 24 hours. That's one of those days you just stay in the room with the robe on and slippers, no boxers or nothing.

What's your favorite part of the female anatomy?
WAYNE: The eyes. The eyes are the window of the soul. You look into a woman's eyes—especially in that moment of having sex or making love—and you can see the truth. You can see if she liked it. That gives you more assurance than a scream, than her clutching you and scratching your back. You look into her eyes and see that she can't control the bliss that you're putting on her. I love that. That's better than a bitch telling me she's coming!

Have you ever used drugs to enhance your sexual experience?
WAYNE: Umm, "some say the ex makes the sex spectacular…." That's my answer to that. When a woman says, "Can't we get something?" or "Gimme something to drink?" I say, "I don't want you to be high because tomorrow you're not gonna know that it felt that great. You kinda negated some of that by being intoxicated." So I always tell the woman I am the ultimate high. I am the drug.

Ray J did The Dirty Dozen too. His answers are a bit too predictable for me. I thinkk I prefer I tiny lil man whose first time was after playing some board games. Who doesn't love board games?!

Ever had sex with a groupie?
RAY J: Of course. I had three groupies and I had them all get in the shower and all wash each other off. They was just following my instructions. Then I had them all get out the shower and I was like, "Now, all y'all stand right there and stay still. I am gonna dry every one of y'all off." So I dried all three off and I told them to all bend over on the bed and they were all lined up exactly together. From there I went in and did my thing. It was very controlling and they followed all my instructions and they were all happy. I was just trying something new and wanted to see if they actually would do it, and they did.

How old were you when you lost your virginity?
RAY J: I had a weird first time incident when I was young. But the real first time [having sex] was at 13 and it was with a girl I liked and I did it at my homeboy's house in the daytime. My performance at 13 was when I knew I had something going on. I knew there was something special about me and I knew I could perform in the future well. It was off da chain. We both wanted to do it and afterwards I felt that the world had done change.

Are you good in bed?
RAY J: I think I am great in bed and the reason why is because I try to satisfy the girl first and make sure she has had enough before I am done. I want to make sure I give everything she needs to get relax and have a relax time. Every shot I make count—pow!

Describe your most memorable sexual experience.
RAY J: The memorable sexual experience that keeps popping up in my memory is the time with my ex-girlfriend [Kim Kardashian] in Cabo, Mexico. It was memorable because I put it on my video camera and the whole world is looking at it. I just can't get it outta my head. I don't think nobody else can either. It was just a fun time together. We were young, we were both 21 and we just had a good time as couples and just wilding out. We just got down with massages, getting drunk and getting down in the Jacuzzi bath.

What celebrity would you most like to have sex with?
RAY J: Nicole Scherzinger. I just got a crush on Nicole from the Pussycat Dolls. I just love the way she looks, the way she moves and I love the title of her group. Pusssssy-Cat Dolls. [Laughs]

Twitter Me Rudy!

Twitter really allows celebs to make fools of themselves. Seems Young Berg and Malik Yoba got real excited after seeing pics of Rudy (Keisha Knight Pulliam) at her 30th birthday party. They hit her up on her Twitter account, but um, seems that account is fraudulent. Yup, some silly bitches created fake Keisha Knight Twitter accounts and then put these dudes on blast after they hit them up:

“@TheRealYungBerg@k_knightpulliam I would love to fly yo sexy ass out to miami wit me, whats good?! hit my line 925-[removed]”

“@malikyoba @k_knightpulliam Damn girl!!! mmm mmm mmm How u have womanized!! Hit Me direct # 310-[removed]“

This is so hilarious. Berg. Seriously. Rudy can fly her own sexy ass out to where ever the hell she wants to be. How bout come at her like a man with some respect and NOT ON TWITTER! If you are as fly as you think you are, and really wanted to get at her you would go thru the proper channels to get her real contact information.

And Malik....all I'm a say is, I hope you had chapstick on when you Twittered.

I know I might be alone in this, but I wish I was of the generation when people didn't have such easy access to er'thang and er'body. I wish I grew up in the day when men had to make an effort to seek you out, maybe mail you letters, actually dial your numbers.

Now a days, you don't even know who you're tweetin. Corny.


Put Some Crack In Yo Pipe...

Miley Cyrus!! I thought I was the only one who can't stand that frog voice, fake teef havin, non singing ass bitch Miley fuckin Cyrus. Seems Jamie Foxx ain't fuckin wit dat bitch either. Funny, funny....

Did he say catch chlamydia on a bicycle seat? HAHAHAHAHAHA! Bitch prolly already did.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

A Real Housewife No Longer Has A House

So Sheree Whitfield of The Real Housewives of Atlanta is losing her home. Yes, her house has gone into foreclosure and there is documentation to prove it. It is real interesting how someone who claims to live so extravagantly and spends money so frivolously just to prove something to everyone else can't pay her mortgage. Now I know she has been waiting on a divorce settlement and I know that her husband was her bread and butter, but maybe instead of buying $3,000 bags for no reason, she could have thought more about her livelihood and her children and keeping a roof over her head. I dunno. Just a thought.

Maybe next season she can live with NeNe. That I would actually pay money to see. Anyway, if you want to see the foreclosure documentations click: What's a budget?

Good luck with that Sheree.

Meet Bo....

The First Dog. Sasha and Malia have a new puppy and he's a cutie patootie!!!

"The 6-month-old puppy is a gift from Sen. Ted Kennedy (D-Mass.), a litter mate of one of their Portuguese water dogs. The Obama daughters named their new pet Bo because they have cousins with a cat named Bo and because Michelle's late father, Fraser Robinson, nickname was Diddley."

The dog of course is hypoallergenic so Malia and her serious allergies will be more than fine. Welcome to the fam Bo Obama!


Saturday, April 11, 2009

She Get It From Her Mama!

Major congrats go out to my wife, my official girl, the most beautiful creation there is, Liya Kebede because her children's clothing line has been picked up by J. Crew!!!!! Liya created the line as a way to provide employment for traditional Ethiopian weavers and to preserve her Ethiopian culture. She told USA Today:

“They [Ethiopian weavers] had this incredible talent, but didn’t really have a market,” she said. “I wanted to introduce them to the Western market…to see if we can help that industry. I wanted to at least do my part for the country.”

And of course, her beautiful daughter Raee (3 years old) is a model for the line. She is also the inspiration....LemLem is Raee's nickname and it means to "flourish" or "bloom" in Amharic. LOVE IT.

How cute is this little girl! And the clothes are adorable too! To check out the line click: LEMLEM!!!


Sideline Ho...

Not too many can dispute that a skeezin sideline ho's main purpose is so a man can get his rocks off with someone else other than his main bitch. I think even the sideline ho know this and doesn't care. I think a sideline is content with gettin whatever she can get out of the deal and maybe sometimes wishin and hopin he makes her the official girl. Monica and T-Boz were on the radio talkin bout groupies and sideline hos who degrade themselves etc. And no, the man never marries the sideline ho but Monica, I would just like to know why would you marry a man who keeps a sideline ho? You said it would be a major problem if you catch a bitch that fucks your man, and I have to wonder would your man have to suffer any consequences?

I just love how women always make it the fault of the woman. Yes she knows he is married or engaged or whatever, but don't HE know he is married and engaged too? Don't he know he got a woman at home that he should be wipin down instead of some trick he met at the club? Then to keep the sideline ho, he is taking food and money out of your mouth and your kids mouth to buy her food, shoes, clothes, dranks, or whatever else she wants just so he can stay gettin that sideline poonnannee.

Oh but I know...she threw it in his face and how was he supposed to resist, right? She's the ho cuz she has no respect for herself and she's just out to steal somebodies man. May all very well be true, but when do women decide that a man will only do what he wants to do with who he wants to do it with AND they aren't as weak or as dumb as so many of us allow them to be. They may not marry the sideline ho, prolly barely want to marry the official bitch, but they sure enough have no trouble bustin nuts all up and thru and then comin home with the poker face....and the official bitch just pretends she didn't notice that he barely beat the sun.

Really Cassie?

So ya'll know I think Cassie is luscious. Gorgeous. Yummy. Hot to def. And if you didn't know well, I think Cassie is luscious. Gorgeous. Yummy. Hot to def. And just as the cover art for her new single, Must Be Love (featuring none other than her unofficial boo Diddy), is released and she's lookin like her normal purdy self.....she goes and switches up her look. Drastically. Cassie done shaved one side of her head. Yeah um.....

Cassie before....

Cassie does half a Britney....

In all honesty, Cassie is so hot she can pretty much get away with being tired of waiting to be Diddy's official girl and decide to get his attention by shaving half her head. Her face allows her to lose her mind. It's fine.

I did giggle a bit a Fabolous talkin bout Cassie on Twitter....

myfabolouslife (Fabolous)

Did anyone see cassie’s new haircut??? I jus dont know whats goin on anymore.. smh..about 4 hours ago from web

Cassie haircut’s not da worst thing n da world but its like 4 what? She a pretty girl, gorgeous hair. goes 2 show u women r never satisfiedabout 4 hours ago from web

Maybe its a publicity stunt/internet buzz thing, or she jus needed a change.. Or had 2 outdo all the Day26 cryin attention.. thats it! lolabout 4 hours ago from web

Looks like one of the haircuts from Edward Scissorhands.. ok, let me stop..about 4 hours ago from web

Is it true? Are women never satisfied? Maybe it isn't WOMEN as a whole but maybe it could be that Cassie sees how people like Christina Miliblonde get attention for goin ridiculous and doin the fugtastical gross blonde hair? I mean Cassie already got the fuckin for tracks steez on lock (Christina Miliblonde is tryna take the crown tho) and she's still not on super star status so....why not shave half her head? And be one of the only bitches who could do that and still be hot. Yup, it's fine.


Thursday, April 9, 2009

Just For Giggles....

ILVTOFU too!!!! I luv to FU and U and U and even U too! What's da big deal?! Seems the state of Colorado isn't feelin it.

Kanye The Gay Fish!

South Park did a lil parody of Kanye West and called him a gay fish. I mean, I giggled but I didn't think it was hilarious. The gay fish looks just like him and he ends up wipin down the biggest hottest fish in the sea yes, but I don't think this caricature was worth Kanye having hurt feelings. Kanye's feelings were hurt by the South Park people and because of this video has decided to turn his life around and become a nicer person and not continue to talk about how dope he is....rather just let the dopeness speak for it's self.

I think it is great that Kanye is now motivated to become a better man BUT I have to wonder why now, why this particular parody got him feelin such a kind of way. I mean how many times has Kanye been called gay or have people askin bout his sexual preference? Who cares about South Park? I think something else is going on in Kanye's life (maybe cuz that Amber chic is over him and he is realizing that if he doesn't get over himself he is gonna end up alone) that has him admitting to having hurt feelings. Maybe it doesn't matter. Maybe all that matters is that Ye is deciding to put his Ego on simma. I think his ego is a huge part of who he is and what he does, but I guess er'body has to grow up some time.

I'm in love with a gay fish!

Tia Twitters

Obviously Tia is not happy bout whatever Mediatakeout done said about her and her show. Word goin round is that CW is getting rid of all their comedies (Everybody Hates Chris and Tia's show The Game) and only keeping the one hour dramas (Gossip Girl, 90210, and the new Melrose Place). Comedy = Black people and they aren't bringing in the ratings so they have to go. Is anybody surprised? They put the show on Fridays when most people aren't even home and they barely do any promotion. It is real unfortunate but this isn't anything new. And it is sad because these are two GREAT shows.

On the flip side, Tia did mention that Mara is pitching the idea of turning The Game into a one hour long dramedy. Let's hope that works. If not, maybe BET will pick up the fourth season....altho, sadly, I'm not sure that will help.

I can't believe in 2009 we are still talkin bout Black shows not surviving and being hidden on random networks. Sucks azz.


Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Record Deal, Schmecord Deal.

Just as I was bout to write some shit about how the buzz is that Solange done lost her record contract with Geffen and some extra bullshit about how Daddy Matthew sacrificed Kelly - hence her being dropped from Columbia - to some how keep Solo....I learn that Solo done Twittered, as she does more than a crack head hits da pipe, that she wasn't dropped. Actually, her words were:

"stooopiddd iddddiots" rumor control for the day:) I was NOT released from Geffen/Interscope... now back to your regular scheduled program:)
about 4 hours ago from web

I don't know about people being stooopiddd iddddiots. I mean, I know that lots of these rumors stem from some kind of truth BUT I was thinking that even tho Solo's album barely sold 100K, her album was dope and her artsy fartsy groove has been rather on point and I don't think she should be dropped. On the flip side, we all know how gorgeous and talented Kelly is and how she is relatively sabotaged each er'time she gets a chance....Solo actually got a release date that didn't have to get pushed back so her sister's album could come out, she's been getting all kind of show dates, and got to perform on high rated television events cuz her sister per usual, shit we all know, and I'm not sayin...just sayin.


Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Would You Quit Your Job...

To work in the White House? Before you answer that....would you quit your job (during the recession no less) if you had a vital role on a highly rated MUST WATCH television show? Well, Kutner, real name Kal Penn (you know him from Harold and Kumar go to White Castle) committed suicide (or did he?) last night on House!!!! And why? Cuz he was offered a job to work at the White House.

Now here is the thing. House is one of my favorite shows. Like, it is now my Monday must-see TV (used to not be on Mondays and now I can't watch How I Met Your Mother and Big Bang Theory until later...but it's fine.) and I love me some Hugh Laurie aka House. Like if there was ever a mean ass old white man that I would wipe down and let do shit to me with that cane...oh indeed would it be House. And I wasn't really happy when the new interns came but once I got used to them, I started to enjoy them and their relationship with House and how they go about helping (or not) their patients. Kutner especially.

So last night, out of the fuckin blue Kutner is found (by Omar Epp's chacter and his white girl intern) DEAD with a bullet to his head in his apartment. Talk about shocked and RumuthafuckinPauled! DA WUT?! I mean WHY??? SERIOUSLY??? I just kept waiting for House to wake up out of some Viocodin induced coma and it all be a dream. But it wasn't. No it wasn't. And I'm thinking, why would they kill him? What happened? WHO would want to leave this show?!!! Did he get in trouble?? WHAT?!!

(Please excuse my rambling. You have to understand that I watch TV like most don't. I know these people in my head, so losing Kutner and watching House struggle with it (or pretend not to) is very real to me.)

So I learn that Kal chose to leave the show and take a SERIOUS pay cut to work in the White House with President Barack Obama. And for this reason only, I understand and am no longer sad. If he left to do another fuckin Harold and Kumar movie or something I would have tracked him down and beat his ass with House's cane myself. I respect Kal more than ever and think it is beyond admirable that he would leave a lucrative career to work in politics and do something that he believes in.

If you watch House, let me know your thoughts. You can also mourn for Kutner if you want...yes FOX set up a site just to offer your condolences. Click: WHY Kutner??? WHY?????

If you don't, and there is a good chance that you don't and you actually read this, maybe now you should!!

Check out Kal's interview with my fave TV-Nista Michael Ausiello (I'm a HUGE Aushole) where he explains it all....Click: Bye Kal. Good luck! Tell Barack I said I love him!

Michelle and Her Mama Do Essence!

First of all you better go Marian!!! Lookin all hot to def and stuff. Michelle's Mama is showin er'body where her daughter gets them fly ass genes from. They both are GORGEOUS!!! I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this cover! Who else would Essence put on their Mother's Day cover? I think this has to be one of my favorite Essence covers ever. Not to mention, the knowledge they are offering in the article about parenting, being Black women, and the importance of the Black family is beautifully heartfelt, wonderfully necessary and amazingly intelligent.

Her's a taste:

The First Grandmother:

Advice on raising children: “The main thing that I think needs to be taught to children is the ability to think and make decisions. You don’t have to have a lot of information, but you have to know how to get through the process. If you make mistakes you don’t [just] decide I will never do that again.”

Enjoying life in the White House: “…I really am. You want to know why? Because my children are good parents. It makes it very easy to be a grandmother when your children are good parents.”

You ain't neva lied Mrs. Robinson!

Pick up this copy of Essence. I know this one is a keeper. Meaning...when you're done reading it, put it back in the plastic sheath it was delivered in or if you pick it up from the newsstand get you something to keep this one nice. Yup, that's just how fly this issue is.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Team Bethenny!!!

So I finally got around to catching last week's episode of The Real Housewives of New York City. Now, I have to say that the NYC bitches are my least favorite of all the Housewives bitches....they are the fugliest, the most annoying, and the most pointless. Of all the fabulousity in NYC it just baffles me that these are the ones representin...then again, those that are fabulous prolly don't have time to be on nobody's reality show. Anyhooo, I still watch and if I had to choose a favorite it is definitely Bethenny. She is the only one one who doesn't take herself so seriously and she is actually smart, witty, and I appreciate her sarcasm.

On the flip side, while the other housewives get on my nerves(Ramona especially), this season Kelly is the new housewife, and I have to say, she is the most ignorant, superficial, mentally challenged, unaware, ridiculous, dumb bitch of all the housewives of all time. Seriously. I feel sorry for her children. And it was obvious that her own children don't like her from the episode that she made the daughters put on pink sweaters when it was summer, it was hot, and they were inside having a cooking lesson by Sam (the first ever Top Chef winner) that they didn't want to have.

Mkay. So this past episode was a follow-up from the previous episode in which there was a meeting of the housewives for a charity event being put on in honor of Jill's daughter who has arthritis. Kelly shows up to the meeting beyond late and only planned to stay a few minutes. When learning that Jill's daughter has arthritis Kelly says, "that's cute." When learning that their names would be on the event she proceeds to rant about how her name doesn't go anything because she doesn't even have time for her own charities. So one of the women in the meeting (not a housewife) siting next to Bethenny asks "who is she?" and Bethenny says, "I don't know. Madonna?" (Heehee)

So in this episode, Kelly invites Bethenny to have a drink with her because she is still upset that Bethenny had to call her names and "be rude" and blah blah. Bethenny actually shows up and of course is on time. Kelly shows up a half hour late, and when Bethenny says I've been waiting for you for a half hour, Kelly says, "Oh really that's too bad." And well, please watch the rest of this 'conversation' for yourself. YOU MUST. All I have to say is, Bethenny handled this confrontation amazingly. She kept her cool, remained poised, always had the perfect response, and allowed Kelly to continue to show the world that she lacks class and brain cells.

It Might Have Been Just Me But I Could Have Sworn.....

That gay is as gay does. No? Mkay. I think I'm really late on this but um....first let me just say that I am NOT shocked and RuPauled that my favorite Atlanta Housewife Dwight Eubanks is rockin fur pants cuz I mean, he's a mess of all proportions, he makes me giggle, and I expect such ridiculousness from Ms. D. What I don't understand, what has me more than confused, and what I no longer find funny is the fact that it seems that Ms. D wants to be a REAL housewife so bad, he done found him a woMan to marry him. Yes, Ms. D is engaged to be married. Please excuse my open mouth and Audrina Eyes.

I can't. I really can't! Oh da hell, who am I kidding! You know Ms. D is getting his own reality show and I can't wait! The thought of him pretending to be in love with a woman while applying his face and curling his wigs is all too much for me to even try to contain my excitement. This is the shizz I love!


Friday, April 3, 2009

Are You Serious?

C-Murder is asking for help. He wants YOU to help pay his legal bills. His brother is the one who is sittin on all kinds of millions BUT he wants people who are trying to pay their mortgages, car notes, and feed their children to donate to his cause....which is payin to help him not have to be on house arrest. Not to mention, he isn't just askin for anything you can offer, he done specified an amount. C-Murder wants $1,000. I can't.


Thursday, April 2, 2009

Why I Love My First Lady

Of course because she is stunning and she and Barack have taken the UK by storm...mostly her with her most fabulous fashion. But I love me some Michelle Obama just because she is just so refreshing. Every time I see her or hear her speak, I feel like she's my big sister or my aunt who is gonna call me when she gets home to ask me about MY day.

Watch the First Lady let these kids in London mob her after she gives them a special speech...and look at the Secret Service like WHOA now...back it on up. Love it.


Kelly Got A Job Ya'll!

All that talk about Kelly being on suicide watch cuz she got cut from her label is obviously bull shizz. Since Bravo has lost Project Runway, one of the bestest reality competition shows, to Lifetime they said fuck it and just recycled that shit....same concept, new hosts, new judges, new name. The show is called "The Fashion Show" and Ms. Kelly along with Isaac Mizrahi will be hosting.

"The 15 designers will compete in the Harper's Bazaar mini challenge -- which will be judged by the magazine's Special Projects Director Laura Brown -- and then the elimination challenge. The winning contestant will nab the $125,000 prize as well as have their clothing line available for retail, so the designs will also have to appeal to the Average Joe or Jane, not the haute couture crowd."

Hopefully it doesn't disappoint and Kelly gets to keep this job for at least a season or two.

Check Kelly on her Bravo Vlog:


Weezy Party Likes A Rock Star!

Because he now is a rock star. Lil Wayne covers Rolling Stone Magazine and says he turned to rock cuz he's tired of rap. I mean, it happens. Even Weezy, despite the sizzurp situation that prolly has had some affect on his brain cells, has to move on and try new ish...especially when you've been rapping and doing the same shizz since you were like 6 years old.

On his new rock steez...."The rock sh-- just comes from what my life is now. I've grown into this person," Wayne told the magazine. "I woke up one morning and had three or four women in my bed where I not only didn't know their last names, I didn't know the beginning letter of their first names. All I know is, they're the most beautiful women in the world, and I was in my own place, in whatever city I as in. And I could have thrown a dart at the map, and I'd probably have a place there too. I knew my driver was waiting downstairs for me. When my nose finally cleared from all the weed I had smoked, I smelled food in the kitchen and I knew it was my chef. Then I look on my phone and see a message and know it's from a popular woman everyone knows. And when I went in the studio that night, I couldn't just rap, 'Yeah, n---a ... .' "

Sounds like the life Weezy F. Baby. Seriously, I cannot wait for the day that I wake up and my thighs are throbbin after the out of control love session Idris and I had, Chef is blendin me a Papaya smoothie, and Driver is waitin to take me where ever da fluff I need to go. Cuz you know the day is coming.

I'm all for the rock star life. Do you Wayne.


Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Over Steppin Her Boundaries

Ok so you guys all know super model of the world Gisele Bündchen who recently married her boo New England Patriots QB Tom Brady, who is the baby daddy of Bridget Moynahan's son? If not, Google it. Anyhoo, Bridge was with child while Tom and Gisele started dating and I believe that is why Bridge chose not to give their son Tom's last name (baby's name is John Edward Thomas Moynahan...and I kind of love that). So there is/was drama but they've managed to keep things as classy as possible and under wraps.

Well just the other day quotes from Gisele's Vanity Fair interview started coming out and in regards to being a step-mother, she basically told Bridget that she doesn't give a shit if she birthed Tom's child, that baby is 100% hers. And I quote: "I understand that he has a mom, and I respect that. But to me, it's not like because somebody else delivered him, that's not my child – I feel it is, 100 percent. I want him to have a great relationship with his mom, because that's important, but I love him the same way as if he were mine. I already feel like he's my son, from the first day. He's a little angel – the sweetest, most cuddly, loving baby. I feel blessed to have him in my life."

When I read that I was thinking, it is wonderful that she loves Tom's baby as her own. The baby has three parents, and maybe if Bridge falls in love again, he'll have four and that is fantastic. BUT I couldn't help but feel like Gisele should keep her friggin mouth shut when it comes to Bridget and Tom's child...ESPECIALLY when it comes to talking about how she know he got a mom and she hopes he has a good relationship with his her but she feels like he's her son, from the first day. BITCH, is it not bad enough that Bridget had to deal with Tom breaking up with her, then fuckin your hot fuckin ass, and then you get to marry him which she thought she was gonna do after giving him years of her life and now you got to go and talk about how HER son is yours?! I mean DAAYUM Gisele, like where is the empathy? Just think about if the roles were reversed. Seriously.

I was kind of hoping that Bridget would somehow respond...but I can appreciate that she's keeping her head held high and not stooping to stank bitch levels...

Good thing her friends are!!! Her friends are not happy about Gisele's comment and one said: "If Gisele loved Bridget's child like he was '100 percent her own,' then she would not talk about him in the press. Discretion and respect are not either of Gisele or Tom's virtues, as was evidenced even when the child was still unborn and they publicly flaunted their relationship without any discretion whatsoever. Don't you think Jack will grow up and read her comments and find them disrespectful to him and his mother? If Tom is such a great father as everyone likes to say, then you would think that he'd respect the privacy of his young child and would ask his wife not to use his son as a publicity prop and a subject of public discussion. Is she is so desperate for attention that she can't find anything more productive to talk about other than Bridget's child?"

And I concur. Thanks Bridget's friend. Well said.