Wednesday, September 30, 2009

I Just Vomited In My Mouth

I wasn't planning on discussin the bullshit that is Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom's wedding. If people want to get married after a knowing each other for only a month, then great for them. What pisses me off and I what I find offensive is the fact that they are basically proving to the world that the sanctity of marriage is a joke in this country, and people care more about the the tabloid pics than the fact that this wedding wasn't even real. They aren't even officially married. They just had a 'ceremony' so that they could premiere it and get those ratings in for the new season of Khloe's show.

But what really is either sad or reediculously funny is this OK! Mag cover. How is it KHLOE & LAMAR's wedding YET the pregnant sister, Kim and Khloe are the total focus of the picture and Lamar's big ass is just barely in the background. They are all Tardy for the fuckin Party. But hey, if people were willin to pay me hundreds of thousands of dollars to be a douche, I'd be tardy for the party too.

Congrats. SMDH.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Isn't Black on Black Violence So 1987?

Some of you may or may not have heard about the teenage boy from Chicago who was jumped and beaten to death by other teenage boys. Horribly senseless, sad, and just depressing. Just WHY?!!!

I couldn't help but think this young boy who lost his life, this boy who was an honor student and loved computers, had the potential to grow up to be the kind of man Black women dream of. The boys who killed him are being charged as adults and will spend the rest of their lives in jail have lost the chance to figure out how not to be victims of their circumstance and grow up to be beautiful, productive amazing Black men. ice box hurts.

Nas wrote a letter to the murderers and young men headed down the same path:

Dear Young Warriors fighting the wrong wars! Killing each other is definitely played out. Being hurt from the lost of a love one was never cool. Dear Young Warriors fighting the wrong war! I know that feeling , that frustration with life and needing to take it out on someone, any one. But…

We chose the dumbest things to go the hardest for. I remember seeing deaths over 8 ball jackets, fila’s , and name plate chains. Deaths over “he say she say”!!!!! “I’m from This block or I’m from that block”, or “my moms n pops is f*cked up now the whole world gotta pay”!!!

I remember feeling like I was the hardest “n*gga” breathin. And I couldn’t wait to prove it. But let’s think. What r we really proving?? And proving what to who?? Everybody knows Chicago breeds the strongest of the strong but I just feel, me, being ya brother from another state feels your pain as if I grew up with you in ya very own household.

You have the ability and mind power to change they way we are looked at. Look who’s watching us young warriors, look who’s throwin us in jail constantly, look at the ignorance in the world. Look at the racist dogs who love to see us down. Lovin to bury us in the ground or in jail were we continue this worthless war on one another. Young warriors…. We are WASTING more and more time. We gotta get on our jobs and take over the world. Cuz This movie left the theaters years ago, Juice, Menace, boys n the hood , blood n blood out, Belly!

When we see each other why do we see hatred? Why were we born in a storm, born soldiers, WARRIORS….and instead of building each other up we are at war with each other.. May the soul of this young person find peace with the almighty. I’m with you young warriors. You’re me and I’m you. But trust me! you are fighting the wrong war.



Just For Giggles...

Please tell me ya'll saw this Seattle news report about the cop who confiscated marijuana and then used it to make weed brownies with his wife...

"I don't know. We made brownies and I think we're dead." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Did you hear the co-anchor laughin so hard she was snorting???!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Sigh...such special people in our world.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Stephon Marbury Needs Help...

Seriously. I don't think a couch and pills are gonna cut it either. Dude needs to be checked in to a special place...where the walls are white and padded. He is a hot mess on three fuckin wheels.

And what I really want to know is...why did he choose to waste his dying brain cells on singin a song about hatin Jay-Z?

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Just For Giggles: Nursery Side Eye

The most interesting thing about this picture should be the Giganto baby that's screamin'...but what's killin me is the tiny baby next to him - who looks like he was born a few hours ago - givin him the serious side eye, like big ass, you think you can keep it down over there, we all just been thru some shit dude. Relax.

But just so you know, the big baby was born in Indonesia and weighed 19 pounds.'t.


Friday, September 18, 2009

Super Group - Tamia, Kelly Price, and Deborah

Say muthafluffin word?!!! Three of the best singers - three of my absolute FAVORITE singers (I Looooooooooove Tamia) - are reuniting to form a super group!!!! Please excuse my squeals of excitement...this is seriously like the best news ever. I mean we can all rejoice that Whitney is back, but we're all honest enough to know that she got about two more albums and some SERIOUS vocal lessons to go before she becomes WHITNEY one more gin. But there really isn't anybody (other than the fierce one...Bey) that is really sangin these days and making me play their albums on repeat like I used to do back in the day.

And this new comes after watching Real Housewives of Atlanta last night and being PISSED that Kim, Kandi and those producers are really showing the world that talent means absolutely nothing and anybody can be fuckin Tardy for the Party. UGH!!! Kim is more tone deaf than a deaf glee club with cochlear implants. Yet Kandi has stated that she can make "anybody hot" and has this silly bitch thinkin she's gonna be a hit. And knowin our tardy for the party society, she will be.

But I digress....real singers Tamia, Kelly Price, and Nobody's Supposed to Be Here Deborah Cox are power group, for right now called "TDK" and their album is called "The Queen Project" and the first single is called "Queen". I can already feel my goose bumps....

Am I the only one who is beyond ready to hear TDK???!!! Can you imagine their live show?!!

To read more about how the group came together click: Never Tardy For The Party.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

AMAZING Michael Jackson Tribute

This Yale University Junior came up with the MOST AMAZING MJ tribute ever! First of all, he can actually sing, but even more than that, he put together a reedicuslously creative tribute with an overlay of so many songs and he sounds like a friggin GLEE club! The best part is that it's all just him!! He somehow managed to sing all the parts, put it all together, and then make a video where there are like 10 versions of him on stage.

Dare I say...genius.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Whitney Makes Wendy Do The Ugly Cry

Oh Wendy...I miss you so much!!! You guys have no idea how much I can now live without my radio now that Wendy isn't on it. Ugh!!!! But I digress...

Wendy was on her show talkin bout the Whitney interview with Oprah, as everyone is, and she broke into the ugly cry because as an ex-offender (read: former crack head) Wendy feels that Whitney didn't take ownership of her real crack situation. You see, only those who got to listen to Wendy er'day on the radio know her bizness like that. Now that America is her new best friend, she's sharing this information with all of them for the first time. So it brought on the nostril flares and the ugly cry...

What I find hilarious about this whole situation is that regardless of whether Whitney smoked crack from a dutch or a pipe, the reason Wendy even has a show right now is thanks to the fact that Whitney was smoked something. Whether you were able to listen to Wendy's show er'day or not, after her infamous Whitney interview, Wendy's professional situation blew up majorly. So really Wendy, who cares?

Whitney No Longer Loves Bobbeeeeeeeeeee

Now that I've seen parts 1 and 2 of Whitney Houston's sit down with Oprah, I can speak on it.

I watched part one with my body tense and my hands clenched literally scurred of what I was going to hear. As much as I wanted to know er'single last detail, there was a part of me that didn't want to know about the destruction, the mess, and the pipes. But what do you know, there were no pipes...only coke laced weed. Sigh of relief on that one. But seriously, I was thinkin Whitney would either be very defensive or way too telling...and I am so glad that she was neither. She spoke her truth, in an elegant matter, with a lil of Newark, New Jerz on the side. Cuz she will fight you back.

If there was nothing else more obvious, it was the fact that she loved Bobby Brown. Even referred to him as her drug and says she was weak when it came to him. They loved hard and fought harder and then became coke heads together...he was also an alcoholic and an angry one. In his fits of rage he would be emotionally abusive to her, he smacked her once, and spit in her face. He also spray painted evil eyes around the house and cut her head off a family picture. Bobby Brown, indeed, is a piece of shit. But it also sounds to me like he's bi-polar...and his mouth is crooked so you have no idea what kind of added trauma that causes.

While Whitney was at the height of her career, Bobby was doing whatever he could to destroy her. His career had been faded and she was the reason for everything...some men have trouble dealing with that. Especially when you are in the same profession and people see you only as the husband of an Iconic Megastar. Oprah asked was Bobby jealous of her. In a way, I kind of feel like Oprah was directing Whitney in what she wanted her to say. Of course he was jealous of her...but I think Oprah should have let her suggest that on her own. It was obvious that Oprah was TEAM Whitney (and we all are) but I do feel like Oprah asked questions that were leading and part of her own perception of what she thought was going on at the time. Like yup girl, I knew it was Bobby all along. I knew it!

Anyhoo...I came across this comment made by this dude named "Onion" on The Root after part one aired. He said:

"Where would women be without a bad man to blame? The question asked by Oprah in her promos for this show was, “What was the worst thing he did to you?” A better question is, “Why the hell would you marry a man who was so bad in the first place? What was it about you that made you desire a person of such low repute?” OK, that’s two, sorry. But once again there’s nothing like a good dose of victimhood and sense of entitlement to warm the hearts of women all over this country. Whitney got what she deserved. Maybe she was just a shell to begin with and all she was was a voice. It was known that Bobby had babies and babie’s momma’s. So, again why Whitney? I think it was because she wanted to ride that ride, and so she did, and she ended up with a very bad hang over. It’s what she deserved because it’s what she asked for. He didn’t force her to marry him. Be a woman and own up to your own mistakes. Your own worst enemy was not Bobby, it was you, Whitney."

Minus the angry black man part, I had to agree with this Onion dude. I think Whitney would agree with him too. Especially since in part two of interview she says she has no regrets because it was in divine order...and as she sang, she didn't realize her own strength until now. It is real easy to sit back and say Bobby did this to her. Yeah, of course he was a bad influence. Of course he used the fact that she loved him so deeply and the fact she took her vows as seriously as they should be taken, to take her down in any way he could once he realized that he was officially a loser. And yes, he is the scum of the earth. However, Whitney played a role in this too. She made the choice to marry Bobby, to breed with Bobby, and smoke coke laced weed with Bobby. And it was her money buyin the shit. She could have at any moment walk out the door....altho she said he wouldn't let her. Now Whitney, how about we just say you didn't want to leave, you weren't ready to leave, and you couldn't leave because you didn't realize your own strength and that had nothing to do with Bobby.

But despite all that, the best part is that eventually she did find the courage and the strength to leave...and she's back and I for one, am so happy for her. She sounded way better than I thought she would during her performance and I teared up. I feel proud of her, genuinely proud and excited for her. Whitney feels like family. She's so familiar, she's so real, she's so every woman.

So now that that is all said and one, I just want to know two I the only one who heard Bobbi Kristina singing on Good Morning America and heard that she did not get the sangin gene and has no business tryna be in the sangin business? And no matter what was going on in their lives, did not nary a person notice that Bobbi Kristina needed braces dumb long ago to fix that 5 mile gap in her teeth that she unfortunately inherited from her crazy ass daddy?

Luh u Whitney, mean it!!

Part 1

Sigh....Only Cuz I'm A Good Person

Dear Jessica Simpson,

I'm sorry that a wild Coyote snatched your dog Daisy and ran away with her. Something tells me that that wild Coyote is pickin bits and pieces of Daisy out his teefus right about now.....Buuuut since you seem to think the Coyote just took Daisy so they could you know, play tag and chase butterflies, I will help with your cause.

HAVE YOU SEEN DAISY? If so, please let Jessica know. She may be in a Coyote's belly, possibly partially chewed, so please be very, very, very careful when you make your rescue, mkay? Spread the word!

Lil Mama Was High....

Off her emotions. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I saw this pic and had to rezusgsh Lil Mama's stage crashin at the VMAs. She finally gave a statement regarding her antics:

"I did not mean any disrespect towards Jay-Z or Alicia Keys. I admire them and look up to them as role models. 'Empire State of Mind' had my emotions running high. In that moment I came up onstage to celebrate my two icons singing about NY."

This really means bitch is off her rocker, diagonal is all off, and there might be a lil powder in her gloss. It's still the most hilarious shizz ever. The fact that she was bold enough to not only jump on the stage during Jay and Alicia's performance but then POSE with them at the end like SHE just KILLED it just means that somebody is definitely TARDY for the party.

Monday, September 14, 2009

I Was Like Um...

The VMAs. Nothing much to say. It was a womp womp. I knew I shoulda just watched True Blood. Anyway, Janet did what she needed to do for her brother, Kanye is an asshole as per usual (why is er'body shocked and rupauled...cuz he stole the mic from a lil country singer & told da truth...he's done this before. Let us not forget this is the man that cried and thru a hissy fit on stage when he didn't win awards he felt he deserved and told the world that George Bush doesn't care about black people. Since when has Kanye not said what he wanted, when he wanted?), Beyonce is the epitome of hotness and class, and Lil Mama's diagonal was off...the mental ward is callin lil girl.

Anyhooo, while there wasn't a damn thing good about the VMAs, I was totally entranced by this press conference after the Buffalo Bills game....this prolly shouldn't be funny as this dude might really have a SERIOUS medical situation that makes him stutter and/or just get really, really, nervous but I was like um.....

Heehee....wooo wooo my time just breathe and relax.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Dirty Money - Angels

So ummmmmmmmmmmmm, what da hell is this shizz? Is Puff really tryna sing? He sounds like Ashley Simpson. Clearly somebody is tryna keep auto-tune alive...don't worry are obviously not alone.

I really hope Dawn and that other chic, you know the two people who can actually SING, get some real shine in this "group"...

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Win a Pair of Ugg Boots!

Do you love Ugg Boots? Aren't they just the best for the Fall and Winter? Enter in a monthly drawing to win your pair now! Click: Rockin my Ugg Boots for details.

ugg boots

President B. Obama Tells Youngins To Stay In School

I think I've said this before....but um, I love me some him.

Hill Harper's "The Conversation: How Black Men and Women Can Build Loving, Trusting Relationships"

Hill Harper, whom you may recognize from CSI: New York and other acting gigs, is also an author and activist and has decided to dedicate his work, time and effort into taking on the serious and more than necessary task of rebuilding the seemingly destroyed relationship between Black Men and Black Women. Hill's latest book, "The Conversation" hits stores TODAY and if you believe there is a disconnect between Black Men and Black Women, but know that there is hope, then I highly recommend you pick up this book.

As noted in the title of Hill' book, "The Conversation" is what is needed and what is lacking between Black Men and Black Women. The continued miscommunication, misunderstandings, distrust, and preconceived notions between Black Men and Black Women could slowly but surely come to an end with something as simple as a conversation. We DO NOT talk to each other. Instead we confuse each other, we hurt each other, we use sex as band-aids, and more often than not, we are completely unaware and not even conscious of what it is we're doing. My many Black Women friends and I, have discussed with each other over and over again how we try to talk to our Black Men, try to explain what we need them to do, how we wish they could be more thoughtful, more attentive, more appreciative, more responsible, more ambitious, more loving, more open, more respectful, more HONEST, and we wonder why they can't they just be MEN (no more Bitchassness, Man-up, take accountability....the list can go on for days). The funny thing is, I think Black Women spend more time complaining to their girlfriends - because it is always great to have someone who will listen and relate over a cocktail or two - instead of really communicating with their men due to frustration, anxiety, weariness, fear, internal issues, and the "I'd rather have a piece of a man who treats me like shit than have no man at all" syndrome. On the flip side Black Men, not all but many, choose to keep their emotions to themselves or talk to their friends about how they aren't happy in their relationship, how they have relations with more than one woman at a time, how women want more than they are willing to give, how Black women are gold diggers and just want to spend their money, how women stay complaining about nothing, and how unappreciative women are about how hard they work and how much they contribute. How AMAZING would it be if Black Men and Women could have these same conversations with each other? What if we actually took the time to address each other's concerns and issues and worked on finding solutions? How enlightened would we be if through real talk, we learned how to build relationships and friendships based on truth and simple understanding? How much happier and at ease would we be if we were comfortable enough to be honest right from the beginning, offer each other our standards and expectations, let each other know what we want, and then decide if it's worth the time and effort needed to pursue one another? How much better off would we be - and our children - if we took the time to work together, build a partnership, and realize that while LOVE is at the heart of it all, being in a relationship/marriage is a business deal - that requires equal time, effort, and willingness to learn, communicate, and make sacrifices for the benefit of each other and your family?

Of course it isn't as easy as it sounds, otherwise, I think we would have figured out how to do this eons ago and 70% of professional, gorgeous, fabulous Black women wouldn't be single and there would be way more than 31% of Black children being raised in two-parent households. That is where Hill Harper and his book comes in :

"My goal is to host a city to city tour of FREE town halls where we can all come together and have a real conversation about what’s really going on. I want single folks, married folks—young and old—to courageously let their voices be heard around this topic that is often discussed on talk radio or afternoon TV shows, but rarely taken on face-to-face within our communities.

AND, I want singles to have the opportunity to mix and mingle at these town halls. Let’s connect singles together in every city we visit!

It’s no secret that a tour like this one—free of charge to its attendees—would be expensive and require corporate sponsorship dollars. I must to prove to the prospective sponsors that this issue is important to us all. How do we do that? I can prove that we care about this issue by sharing high book pre-sale numbers with them. And by tracking what area of the country the pre-sales come from, we can be sure to schedule the tour cities for those areas.


We all have to join The Conversation and begin to work on these relationship issues."

Steve Harvey had women wanting to "Act Like A Lady and Think Like A Man"....I personally believe a woman should act like a woman, think like a woman, and understand her man and men should most certainly act like men, and think (thinking of any kind would be great :) and understand his woman. The best way to do that is to have the conversation. It's time we talk to each other! Support Hill Harper and support this book! Bring The Conversation to your city! We owe it to each other to fix us, to re-build the relationship between the Black Man and Black Woman, to nurture the Black Family, to leave legacies, and love each other. Spread the word...

Why not start now? Take the time to have a real conversation with your man or your woman today!

Black Love Is Beautiful....Black Love Is Amazing....Black Love Is Us.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Shame On You Bank Of America!!!

Please tell me why a Bank of America teller wouldn't let a man BORN WITH NO ARMS cash his check because he couldn't give a thumb print? I'm surprised he didn't just smack the shit out of her....oh wait.

No Way Is This Maia Campbell...Right?

Please tell me this is just some lady who happens to look really similar to Maia. I'm refusing to believe this is her...

Word on da screets is that "Maia" is a straight up prostitute and crack head. Did the "In the House" checks really just stop coming? Just why?

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

One Time For Whitney Ya'll!!

Well one thing is definitely for sure, Bobbi Kristina did not get the sangin gene. But more importantly, while it is obvious that Whitney can no longer SANG like we know Whitney can sang, her performance on Good Morning America was rather great. I think she looked great, she was entertaining, and even with the voice crackin she sounds a mazillion times better than so many of these new age no talent havin heffas.

Good job Whitney. Welcome back. We missed you, boo!

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Are You Excited For Fall TV?????!!!

You bitches have Facebook and Twatter. I have my TV. The end of summer blues is only made better knowin that I get to rock my zexy 4 1/2' knee boots and I get to watch GREAT TV. And so it begins....

Last season Private Practice officially became better than Grey's and that should not have been the case. Now, for this season, I would have preferred Izzie die than George, but it should be interesting to see what happens with her tryna go back to work and how Alex deals with it all, and I'm really hoping that Meredith's real life baby gets written into the story (can you imagine Meredith tryna be somebody's mother???!!! Enter McDreamy, stay at home dad who has legal custody), and I really want to see how Yang deals with her post-war traumatized boyfriend (I still don't know if I like that relationship)....but my hope is that now that George is dead, Burke can come back...miracles do happen you know.
We shall see....

I CAN'T!!!

And for this reason alone...I am prolly gonna have to watch Dancin wit da fuckin Stars (but I don't want to!!!). Why does Macy look like the dude?! Shouldn't her toe be pointed like that? Why does she look like she's about to stomp around him while he glides doin a grand plie and releve?! Thanks alot Macy. Damn you!