Monday, February 4, 2008

F.U. To The Rescue!

It's that time again. Someone has called upon me to help them out of baby mama hell. Let's get to it, shall we.

Dear F.U.,

I have been reading your blog for a while, and read your advice section, and I like your style of advice giving. My question revolves around some baby momma drama. I have been with my man for a little over three years. We are blissfully happy, there are no questions about that. He and his baby momma have been broken up for over two years before we got together.

But F.U., I am ready to beat this bitches ass. I am sick and damn tired of this bitch constantly trying to get back with my man. She has been begging for THREE years, to take her back, via text message and in person, saying things like would you take me back for our son's sake. He lets her know that I have his heart and that they are done and there only relationship has to do with the child, which is why she tells her son to let me know she does not like me and tries to fight me when she see me. Right now, she lives 5 hours away, but this summer she and her husband (yes that is right she is married and has another child) are moving up her about 20 minutes away.

How do I handle this? I have no issue with my man, I believe him when he says he is done. My problem is with the constant disrepect from this girl (she does not deserve to be called a lady). Do I refrain from doing anything and let my man handle it or attack like a momma pit bull?

Sincerely,
Ready to kick that bitches ass in Texas

Dear Ready,

I feel your pain boo. Is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bitch?! She sounds like she is deserving of a round kick to her left temple. BUT before you slap a ho, I just want you to breathe and really think about it. This bitch is a fuckin loser. She sees that you are incredibly happy with a man that she obviously couldn't keep and her insecurities are suffocating her. So the only thing she knows to do is beg and plead and send messages via her son...and she's been doing this shit for THREE YEARS. She is a jackass of all proportions (a very persistent jackass) and if I were you, I would just laugh at her. I would take pictures of you, your man and her son and send them back in the boy's book bag. And when she sees ya'll cheesin, huggin and kissin with the thumbs up sign in every pic that is going to cause her to lose it! I don't even know ya'll and I'm lauging at the thought of that. HA!

What I want to know is....does her husband know that she is still trying to get back with your man? Like where the hell is he in all this? Like WTF?! She obviously married this guy for every other reason except that she loves him. And she prolly convinced him to move closer...you know so that the son could be closer to his father. But really, this bitch has a plan. She is indeed moving closer so that she can move in on your situation. She prolly thinks that the stress from her harassing the both of you will cause you to give up and break up with him. Don't give her that!

If you and your man have the wonderful relationship that you say you do, then forget this raggedy heffa. And if you trust that he is totally turned off by her advances then trust and believe, if you both ignore her, she'll go away. I know that seems ridiculous since its been three years, but it seems like she has been harassing ya’ll for three years because she knows that she can and although it hasn’t gotten her the man, she gets something from it. The bitch is crazy. You need to tell your man to simply erase her text messages. I would tell him not even to read them but it could be something important about the son. When she calls, he needs to say is this about my son? If she says yes, then let her say what she is going to say and then hang up. I mean after three years of trying to get back with him, he shouldn't have but two words for her anyway.

Now I will say this....since she is moving closer to you, you may very well come in contact with her. If she is blatantly disrespectful to your face then I say go get her tiger! If it comes down to a face to face and she loses her mind, then you lose yours, and beat that bitch like she stole something....but make sure its on your property so that she can't get you arrested. But if she isn't bout it like that, then you keep your Claire Huxtable on and show her that you are a grown ass woman and don't have time for her silly, young ass shenanigans. She has what you want boo....smile and nod at that bitch....but keep your switch blade in your pocket at all times.

Let me know how it all works out. Now go and have your man sweat your perm out...and then make sure he pays for the touch up.

F.U.

1 comments:

Elle said...

Great advice girl!