F.U. To The Rescue....Just In Time For The Holidays

So it is Christmas Eve and it is the first day I've been able to just sit and do nothing in about four days....so I decided to check my email and what does F.U. find? A letter asking for advice about relationships during the holidays. It has been a minute since any of you bitches have needed rescuing, so I'm more than happy to add my 12 cents. Let's get to it. Dear F.U., My first time to your site was about two weeks ago and let's just say I am so happy my friend put me on! There are so many things I want to tell you like, I totally agree with your stance on Barack Obama and if anyone should be supporting him, it should be black women. I also wanted to tell you that I didn't like Pauletta's dress either. Those rings on the bottom definitely had the bedspread look. And, overall, please keep doing what you do. I saw that you have a "F.U. to the rescue" section and I read those and laughed hysterically. I wasn't sure if any of those people actually took your advice, but I know for sure it was what they needed to hear. Since I'm having a problem of my own right now, I just thought for the hell of it, I would find out just what would F.U. do? I'm in my early thirties and I've been with my boyfriend for a few years. We had a baby almost 6 months ago and for the most part we are very happy. My boyfriend has been married before and has two other children. Getting married again is not something that he wants to do but he hasn't ruled it out altogether. I think I am okay with us never getting married only because I know that he loves me and our child and after hearing about his first marriage I would never want things to end up that way for us. The problem is his mother and his family -- including his other children. I hate them. His mother makes it known that she wishes he were still married to his ex-wife and she is always talking about his other kids. She hasn't seemed to be too interested in his newest grandchild but when she is with our baby she does act like she cares a little bit. I know I shouldn't hate the kids because it isn't their fault, but I can't help it. When they come around I find reasons not to be around. When I have no choice but to look at them, I think I'm good at pretending but I try to always have a headache or something just because looking at them annoys the hell out of me. I wish they didn't exist. He wants us to go to his family's house for Christmas since we went to my family's house for Thanksgiving. I kind of have no choice but to go. Ever since the baby was born my hatred has gotten worse and I don't want my child around them. What do I do? Is something wrong with me? Is it bad to feel this way? I haven't really told anyone how I've been feeling and I knew that you would do nothing else but keep it real. Your newest fan, T.J. Dear T.J., First let me welcome you to F.U.'s world. Second, Barack for Prez!!!! Ok, so here is what I think of your situation.....I think I can understand. Your man had a life and a family before you and while he had no problems moving on, his family is still stuck in the past. And you are reminded of his past on a consistent basis whenever you see his children or they are mentioned. I guess that could be hard. However, you are a grown ass woman and unless those kids are stankin ass devil heathens, then you need to get over yourself and try your best to accept them and if possible, love them. The kids didn't ask to be here and clearly your man, as he should, is playing his role as a father and he loves his kids. Not to mention that your baby should be part of its brother/sisters lives. As for the mama. Fuck that bitch. If I were you and she continually made it her business to let me know that she would rather the ex bitch over me, then I would, as kindly as possible, tell that bitch that I'm here and I ain't goin no fuckin where. Now she can either accept that or not, but in my presence she will shut the fuck up and respect me or there will be problems. Either that OR tell your man that if his mother wants to continue to disrespect you then you will no longer make it your business to attend his family functions or allow her to be in your baby's life...even tho she is acting like she doesn't really care too much about your baby she does. You can believe that. I think she just wishes the baby wasn't yours. And then speaking of your man...you need to talk to him about your feelings. You need to let him know how his family makes you feel. He may need to speak on it and tell his mother to simma the fuck down. So I'm not saying ruin Christmas (if you read this in time....yeah, I don't check my email regularly...sorry boo) BUT maybe you might want to just tell your man about your apprehension of going to his family X-mas function and if he could just have your back for the night. Then you can work on fixing the deeper issues in time. I also wonder if you may be experiencing postpartum depression. You may want to talk to your doctor if your feelings have intensified since the birth of your kid. Now F.U. isn't a doctor but I'm saying....it might could be a possibility and you should either read up on it or look into it. So hopefully this helps and you can work it out. Be nice to those kids on Christmas and from now on bitch. Merry Christmas!!! F.U.