The Gist: American Music Awards

So the AMAs were last night and I don't really have anything good to say. With the exception of Beyonce, Alicia Keys, and Kanye the show was a total womp womp. I was switchin back and forth between episodes of Snapped that were way more entertaining. Christina Aguilera opened the show and did a medley of 7 of her hits in 7 minutes. I normally appreciate Christina, but I think one great performance of one great song would have more than sufficed. It wasn't the worst, but my Audrina Eyes were on full blast. Following that, the only things that I remember are as follows: -I want the New Kids on the Block to put it in a seat and never get up again. -Ne-Yo...I really wish he didn't annoy me so much...like I really wish he stayed in the studio. But he was good. -That Taylor Swift chic sang that song right to that Jonas boy who broke up with her. How great would it have been if she actually moved while she sang? - I love Pink. Hated her dress. Or maybe I just hated it on her. - I hate The Jonas Brothers. Really hate them. Whatever they were singing sounded awful. Really awful. I'm so confused. Really confused. - Mariah. Mkay. She clearly has achieved Icon status and surpassed every artist ever in history and she deserves all of it. However, when you are making your douchey lil husband take part in your stage show because he has nothing else better to do and that is the most entertaining part of the whole show - yes, the 2.2 seconds it took for him to walk you down a stair - I think you may want to look into retirement, boo. I've always thought Mariah was one of the best singers and worst performers in the world, and I don't think she should keep proving this as her career comes to an end. She should end on a glorious high note. Let us remember you from the old days. Like yeah, we already know that you can't dance, hell you can't even move while you sing except for when you flail your arms, switch the mic from hand to hand, and check your levels in your ear piece with your finger BUT at least back in the day your songs were good. Great, actually. The shit you've been singing lately.....yeah, just no Mimi. - Leona Lewis really may just be the new Mariah. - Coldplay was horrible. Was Chris Martin high? - Could anybody understand what da hell the guy from The Fray was singing? - Jordin Sparks gets on my nerves. - I hate Miley Cyrus too. Again, I just don't get it. - Rihanna looks fabulous just all the time HOWEVER, at some point that just won't be enough. Her performance sucked. I don't care what you say, that shit sucked. I would still slop her up wit a biscuit tho. - Kimberly is my favorite Pussycat Doll. Did anyone else notice when Melody couldn't get her jacket off? That was funny. - Beyonce. Actually, Sasha Fierce did the Single Ladies dance and was fabulous as per always. I stay entertained. - Kanye gives good show. I don't know about him being Elvis nor should he want to be Elvis, but um, Kanye is definitely goin in the history books. - Alicia Keys was the belle of the ball. She looked BEAUTIFUL! Her dress was gorgeous. And her performance with Queen Latifah and Opera diva Kathleen Battle was the best of the night. That's all.