ANTM: I HATE TYRA MAIL

I HATE TYRA MAIL. I HATE TYRA MAIL. I HATE TYRA MAIL. In case you can't tell, I fuckin hate Tyra Mail. The ding bat that came up with the bright idea to have the models read the fuckin Tyra Mail aloud on the scroll deserves to have their teeth pulled out with a wrench one by one and then beat with a crobar. But now that I've gotten that off my chest, last night's episode of America's Next Top Model was one big product placement. There were the Apple Bottoms in which the girls showed off their "apple bottoms" in their free Apple Bottom jeans, the trip to Wal-Mart to have the Covergirl challenge, and then there was the photo shoot in Elle McPherson's bras and knickers for her new lingerie line. If you could see past all of that, there was also the makeovers. Tyra basically made everyone blonde and gave everyone weaves with the exception of Stacy Ann and Claire who both got baldies. Overall, I think everyone looks pretty good and I think that is because everyone looked good to begin with. I think Fatima needed the most help because her fugly pumpkin hair was a mess and I think the long dark weave definitely works. I think Dominique still looks draggish but she looks softer with the short cut and I love Marvita's hair. Then there was the obvious foreshadowing that ANTM is so famous for. Focusing on the bitch that is going home. And the bitch Allison most certainly deserved to go home. Allison had "modeling" experience and thought she was better than everyone and just knew she was going to win and said so numerous times. She also got highly upset when Fatima said she was bigger than her (which she is and Fatima was just stating the obvious and for the first time I truly felt like Fatima wasn't being a stank ass) and she was like oh great, tell than to the anorexic. Bitch no one is worried about you and your anorexia. You are bigger than her dumb ass! And then she is still mad at Fatima and goes on to say some shit like your black so you like it up the butt. Fatima took offense but I don't think she drilled into that bitch like she should have. Anyway, bitch took an ugly ass picture and Tyra sent her ass home. For some reason though, I think Tyra picked the worst picture for everyone. I didn't like anyone's picture. I liked the concept of the photo shoot but nobody nailed it. However, I did have a few faves. Marvita works the horse tail and gives us the fierceness. Katarzyna looks like she's headed to Victoria's Secret. Fatima works the long weave. She and Iman have to be second cousins. This bitch couldn't believe she was in the bottom two and then lost it when her name wasn't called. Go throw up somewhere bitch.